Please, No Tests

Please, No Tests - 9/2/2020

I hate tests. I always have. I’m a pretty good student, but I’ll take a paper over an exam any day. Tests make me anxious because I never feel like I’ve studied enough (to be fair, sometimes I haven’t). I also don’t like the prospect of failing (maybe you can resonate with that?).

As I’ve been reflecting on “being in the wilderness” I’ve been reminded that, in the Bible, wilderness experiences usually involve testing. The Israelites were tested in the wilderness. They failed! But God was faithful anyway. Jesus was tested in the wilderness. He was faithful! In this wilderness the Church is being tested. 

Think about this with me. How are Christians responding to the political environment? How are Christians reflecting Christ in their social media presence? How are Christians responding to the issues surrounding racial inequity? How are Christians responding to COVID? How are Christians responding to laying down their individual rights for the good of others? Let me be a bit more pointed. Are those who name the name of Christ responding with the fruit of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control)? Are Christians choosing humility – like Jesus – refusing to judge quickly and asking how they can serve others? Are Christians choosing unity around the Gospel, or allowing division around other ideologies? 

My assessment? This testing is a time of purifying. I’m not sure that our affirmations are aligning with our attitudes. There are many quiet examples of grace-filled, Spirit-following believers, but there is also a lot that doesn’t feel that way. I know that the Kingdom of God will advance, but I think it might be much a smaller army than when we started this season. Stronger, but smaller. 

Before you accuse me of casting stones, I have had to wrestle with my own heart in this season. Judgement, frustration, resignation (without joy), discouragement, and anxiety have all showed up to the party at one time or another. But, I have found two things that are hopeful about wilderness testing: 1. The test isn’t graded until the end – so we can make corrections; 2. God is a God of grace who has provided forgiveness through Jesus – so we can confess and repent.

So…I hate tests. But I have never been able to get out of a test, I have always had to get through the test. Thankfully, while God gives the test, He also stays with me through it. My prayer that I will be faithful, I hope you will be too.

Pursue Christ – He is enough,

            Pastor Jeff

Wilderness Lesson #3

I’ve only been to the store twice in 6 weeks. As I was driving by the Fred Meyer I often pass on my way to work, I realized that I haven’t been in the store since the Washington “Stay at Home” order went into effect. That’s highly unusual. Prior to COVID-19, I would stop at Fred Meyer at least once a week, just because it was convenient to run in and grab something I had forgotten on my last trip.

The wilderness can be very disruptive because it unveils what we take for granted (for better or for worse). These can be things as simple as stopping to pick up something at the grocery store to much deeper and more profound things like meaningful relationships or the frenetic activity that helps us hide from our brokenness or inadequacy. What have you been taking for granted, that may have been unmasked in this season of sequestering?

The positive side of this experience is that the wilderness provides us with a moment to recalibrate. Taking the accessibility of food and other items for granted, as small a thing it seems to be, has led to two places of recalibration for me (maybe you can resonate with these): 1. a failure to be deeply grateful for all the “regular” blessing that God has provided; and 2. a tendency to be less thoughtful about how I invest my time.

This isn’t a huge revelation (though there have been a few of those too), but it is a point of transformation. The author of Hebrews tells us to lay aside “every weight” in order to “run with endurance the race set before us.” That includes the small and seemingly unimportant weights (like taking simple things for granted) as well as the significant ones (like areas of sin, relational wounds, and regret).

I’m not interested in building a whole new set of resolutions for after the “Stay at Home” order is lifted - that might just be too overwhelming - but I also want to be careful that I don’t just resume the patterns that I had prior to the disruption. The wilderness gives us an opportunity to identify points we need to recalibrate our thoughts, our behaviors, our values. Let’s not squander the moment.

Pursue Christ – He is enough,

            Pastor Jeff